Cocky Bastard is our eastern European import and he’s no ashamed to tell us it’s the girls who give him the nickname. In fact, Cocky Bastard isn’t ashamed to tell us anything.
He recently refused to attend his sister’s wedding because he didn’t approve of her choice in husband.
“But isn’t a husband her choice?” we ask, and Cocky Bastard tells us that where he’s from the women must obey men, including their brothers.
“It’s tradition,” he says, and when we question tradition, Cocky Bastard simply adds “Tradition is handed down from elders who knew best.”
We’re these elders perhaps Cro-Magnon?
“Women need to be with me, because they’re not strong,” says Cocky Bastard as he gets undressed.
Women might want to be with him for the eyes, the tight body, but certainly not his views on women’s liberation.
“Men are the hunters, women stay home,” he says without a hint of irony, and what can we say?
The kid is honest, we’ll give him that.
So what does the cocky bastard love best about himself?
“All of it,” he says, flexing his muscles.
Mercifully, when the camera starts snapping, he stops talking. It’s pleasing to hear someone give him orders. “Get on the floor,” “I want you on your knees,” “Get a hard on.” So who’s the hunter now?
Cocky Bastard’s long dong follows directions, too. Sometimes, it’s best to watch and not listen. That’s why we’ve got him shut up and stripped for your pleasure.
Jake was a cannon cocker in the army. Our favorite post!
He was discharged after injuring his shoulder, and although this Midwestern babe doesn’t miss the idea of going to fight a war, he does miss the camaraderie.
“The military is like a fraternity, only times 100,” he says.
When we politely ask this tattooed charmer to touch himself as he masturbates his thick cock, he says, “You mean you want me to play with myself?” Yup, that’s what we want.
Jake happily obliges because his motto is never be bashful, go after what you want. And that’s why he’s here. It’s also why he likes to take girls shopping—so he can have sex in the department store dressing room while they trying clothes on. As Jake puts it, “If she’s gonna test drive it, I want to see how it rides…”
Jakes got brains, and he’s got a full cock too. “I’ve got a four day load,” he says. And after it gets all over his stomach and a little bit on the furniture of the three-story Chicago penthouse, he says usually he shoots further.
So what’s his secret to shooting further?
“Arizona Green Tea,” answers Jake, “With Ginseng.” Apparently, it waters the sperm down, make it easier to jettison—it’s not as condensed.
You heard it first at PLAYGIRL, from our on-site Midwestern cannon cocker. Fully discharged!
The second massive man at our Palm Springs shoot is Zeb Atlas. Originally from the soggy state of Oregon, Zeb made the sunny transfer to Las Vegas and bulked up into the big kid known as Zeb Atlas. He was born to be Zeb Atlas, he says, and by the looks of it, he could carry the world on his shoulders, and most likely turn it over and bench press it.
Zeb is a world famous bodybuilding model—he even has his own production company to support all the fans that flock to “body worship” him. And how does he feel about all the attention? “I just like to be appreciated,” says Zeb of his fan base, both male and female.
As Zeb calmly and coolly gets undressed, we begin to fantasize about him in some sort of superhero porn. “The Thing” from Fantastic Four? Perhaps painted green as “Incredible Hulk?” “I don’t care,” says Zeb, “So long as I get to do it with Wonder Woman.”
Once totally naked, Zeb rubs sensuously worships his own muscles as the camera snaps. He’s done this before and it’s obvious: Narcissism has never looked so good. At one point, he towers over a giant spouting Grecian urn, and superhero Zeb Atlas is Hercules.
Oh, and if you must know–it’s all proportional. Don’t trust us? Check his thing out for yourself here.
Damon’s a big boy—with a baby face. He got all wet for PLAYGIRL in a steamy shower shoot, and then got back to nature for the finale.
In the future, Damon plans to treat cancer patients as a future oncologist. He is a big hearted boy and he likes to help others (you gotta love a helper!) and if he takes care of patients anywhere near as well as he takes care of himself, cancer doesn’t seem so bad.
Damon Phoenix used to be in the Navy—he was an aviation electronic technician—try saying that five times really fast…and did we know that the Navy has more planes than the Air Force? Or that the Army has more boats than the Navy? Who really cares when all we can focus on is the big beefy body (or is that booty?) of Damon posing stark naked on a pile of purple bougainvillea blossoms.
The military found Damon’s nude profile posted on a XXX adult internet site, and then gave young Damon an honorable discharge. Of course we know why it was honorable, because there is nothing dishonorable about the discharge he gives PLAYGIRL.
Johnny Castle takes his name from Patrick Swayze’s character in Dirty Dancing. And has this kid got the moves. He’s stripped and strutted his way to earn the title “Man of the Year” from Men Magazine. Dark and handsome Johnny packed up his rock hard abs and monster cock and made the move from New Jersey to California all in the name of his favorite four letter word: PORN.
Not to say Johnny doesn’t have other talents. He’s got a master’s degree in Psychology, so there’s brain with the brawn. It’s just his hobby took off, and he’s making the most of it. Forget psychology, he’s better at red hot chemistry. Johnny shoots off sparks with a perfect penis and a killer smile. Oh, and then there’s the washboard body.
His favorite date would be this series of events: Dinner, movie, and then Dessert (if you know what he means). He’s transfixed the set with somme star quality masturbation. Nice and slow, he loves the camera and (boy!) does the camera love him. When he climaxes, there is a collective moan, and before we can get him a rag to clean himself, Johnny uses his own fingers to wipe the sperm off his chest and fling it into the grass. Lucky lawn.
Hunky Adam showed up to set with a buddy in tow. They drove out from Las Vegas together, so he could show his apprentice how it’s done. Everything that happens in Vegas, instructs Adam, doesn’t necessarily stay in Vegas. If only every young aspiring nude model had a big brother like Adam.
Adam is a bulging 260 pound pack of muscle. When he’s not training for bodybuilding competitions, Adam goes out with girls who are classy by day and whores by night. He prefers his ladies to wear short skirts and no panties because he likes to peek up there, he admits, “In preparation for a career as a dirty old man.” That’s a million years off.
Eventually, Adam plans on moving to Maui, because “the island girls are calling his name.” He is also a wedding photographer, and has connections on the island. This stud occasionally gets into trouble photographing weddings. At the receptions, guests get drunk and silly and often the girls don’t keep their hands to themselves. Once, it was the bride who wouldn’t stop fondling his package. At her own wedding!
Out of respect for the groom, Adam wouldn’t let her have his naked cock. Thankfully, his job with PLAYGIRL has everything with giving a woman what she wants. And what the bride couldn’t have.